Circus Balloon Club
Nordens største ballonklub, stiftet 1978


Varm luft

Denne side indeholder (forhåbentligt) sjove indslag fra ballonernes (og flyvningens) verden.

Oops

This is the 'Oops' list of aviation - enjoy...

Some actual logged maintenance complaints by Qantas pilots

Here are some actual logged maintenance complaints and problems as submitted by Qantas pilots and the solution recorded by maintenance engineers.

(P = the problem logged by the pilot.)
(S = the solution and action taken by the engineers.)

P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200 feet per minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget.

Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta

Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta er verdens største ballonstævne med op til 1000 deltagende balloner. Stævnet afholdes hvert år i oktober måned i New Mexico i USA. Nedenfor er indsat to film fra YouTube.

Første filmklib er fra en masseopstigning.

Andet filmklib er fra en 'før solopgang' flyvning - noget som generalt kræver special tilladelse.

Læs mere om Albuquerque Balloon Fiesta her. Hjemmesiden for stævnet kan ses her.

Darth Vader ballon

The Darth Vader Balloon

Varmluftsballoner kan også laves i andre former end den normale ballonform.

Marts 2007 blev en Darth Vader ballon fløjet for første gang.

Se mere på www.darthvaderballoon.be.

Kæmpe fællesopstigning fra Reno Balloon Race 2006

Klik på billedet for at vise en lille film fra en noget kaotisk kæmpeopstigning.

Vittighed

Denne vittighed florerer i mange versioner på både dansk og engelsk på Internettet.

En mand i en luftballon indså, at han var faret vild. Han så en mand på jorden og reducerede højden.

"Undskyld, kan De hjælpe mig? Jeg havde en aftale om at mødes med en ven for en time siden, men jeg ved ikke hvor jeg er".

Manden på jorden svarede: "De befinder Dem i en varmluftballon hævet ca. 30 fod over jordens overflade imellem 40. og 41. nordlig breddegrad og mellem 59. og 60. vestlig længdegrad".

"De må være konsulent," sagde ballonskipperen.

"Det er jeg," sagde manden på jorden, "men hvordan kunne De vide det?"

"Jo", sagde ballonskipperen, " alt det De har fortalt mig er teknisk set korrekt, men jeg har ingen ide om hvad jeg skal bruge informationerne til, og fakta er, at jeg stadig er faret vild: Det eneste jeg har fået ud af Deres hjælp er, at De har forsinket mig yderligere".

Manden på jorden sagde:"De må være leder".

"Det er jeg," sagde ballonskipperen, "men hvordan kunne De vide det?"

"Det er simpelt," svarede manden på jorden. "De ved ikke hvor de befinder Dem, eller hvor De skal hen. De har bevæget Dem opad ved hjælp af en stor mængde varm luft. De har lavet en aftale, som De ikke er i stand til at overholde, og De forventer at folk under Dem skal løse Deres problemer. Fakta er, at De befinder Dem i nøjagtig samme position som før vi mødtes, men nu er det hele pludselig min skyld".

En gammel historie fra den virkelige verden

Fra Ballooning Handbook, Don Cameron

The reporter from the Daily Telegraph said it would be interesting to have pictures taken above the clouds and the Met. Office had confirmed that it was a layer of stratus, based 3,000 ft, and 600 ft thick. I began to climb towards it.

At 3,000 ft the cloud still looked as far above as it had on the ground, so I continued climbing. We finally reached the base at 6,000 ft. It is a curious psychological effect, but a pilot who normally does most of his flying at 1,000 ft feels out of place and insecure at 6,000 ft - a totally irrationel feeling, of course, because life depends on the security of the balloon at anything over 30 ft.

We entered the cloud and climbed uneventfully until we broke into the glorious sunshine at 7,000 ft. Flying at 200 ft over the cloud tops the feeling of security returned, equally irrationally. The scene was beautiful - to hover with no speed, enjoying sunshine which no earthbound mortals would see that day, gave a sense of privilege.

After a time we decided to go down, and found that the rate of descent decreased as we entered the cloud tops. Then it stopped altogether although I had not been burning. We were floating on the cloud surface like a cork on water. For quite a few seconds we stayed there until the balloon cooled anough to sink into the cloud.

As the balloon sank through the thick fog of the cloud something happened which gave me a chill of, this time, completely rational fear. I heard the sound of an aeroplane engine, I felt panic. We had no parachutes. The sound got louder. Why, I wondered, had I ever taken up this ballooning business? Feeling the need to do something I pulled on the vent line to speed our descent, and of course it made very little difference.

At last the sound reached its maximum, and began to recede. We all breathed again. The statistical chance of a collision outside controlled airspace is remote, and the aircraft probably was never closer to us than a mile but it was a nasty moment. We broke cloud at 6,000 ft and did not go back into it that day.

Det skal bemærkes at flyvning med balloner i skyer i dag ikke er lovligt.

Endnu en gammel historie fra den virkelige verden

The Lawn Chair Pilot

Læs mere på The Official Site Of "The Lawn Chair Pilot" og på Wikipedia.